Hey all,
I just read a message asking that I do an update or write-up about some gear. I want to encourage everyone to comment here or send me an e-mail if you're ever interested in hearing about anything.
As for an update: well I'm still alive, COVID-19 and all. Fairly certain I got it early on, before the lockdown, it was pretty serious feeling but not the worst flu I've had (definitely top 5). In 2020 I haven't been dressing as much, partially due to work being totally insane and partially because I was in a relationship where my partner didn't know about my masking and because she was over all the time, so I had no ability to mask really. However, for most of the year I had little to no interest in dressing. During this time, instead I had a stronger urge to dress up in latex and silicone in my 'male' version or my Animus side. She tolerated it on a couple occasions, but didn't seem to enjoy it all that much.
through the year the relationship sort of petered out, however I think we stayed together because of the lockdown, now that it's lifting, it made sense for us to split.
Through the year it made me start to reassess how I engage relationships. I don't think that I will be heavily pursuing fetish relationships, rather I'm hoping to find someone stable that I can start a family with (eventually). It makes me wonder about my fetish in the future, since I do think that every so often I get strong urges to dress and when I'm single, those urges are more frequent. The problem with having this fetish as a replacement for a partner is that after all the fun, I always find the process of undressing sort of empty and lonely (it's also relieving to get out of all those layers). However, from having luckily had a couple partners who are into fetish, I've also found that my female masking is something I prefer to do the most alone (perhaps with another masker, but that's never happened). Then wearing masc-latex during sex is interesting, but it's not at all the same experience as female masking.
The break-up is still fresh, so I haven't been gripped by masking again, but I'm sure that it'll come back soon enough. I still have sort of a back-log of older pictures and videos that I'm slowly working through. However, also in 2019-2020, I took up a new hobby/passion that's sort of re-shaped my body, so my arms are more muscular than they've been before. It makes me sad on some level, since I know that female masking will be harder to achieve a believable look, so I'll have to figure out ways around that, but I'll try my best! I'll likely be posting a bit more in the coming weeks/months, so stay tuned!
6 comments:
Whatever makes you happy. Oh, and you'd be surprised... Some people like muscular chicks. A lot of maskers work with what they have, and manage to enjoy themselves even if their look isn't the best. The bottom line is to do what you want.
I do think all you have done is pretty cool, if you are happy with what you post then people will be happy as well :) no matter if you think your arms are bigger or whatever! It looks dope!
Fetish and family... We should talk...
I think its selfish of me to asked you to continue your fetish as a huge fan of your work. As I grow older I've realized its whatever makes you happy that counts the most.
Hey Anima, I hope everything is fine with you. I think this hiatus is natural... I'm watching other maskers take a break or withdraw from the community. I have been thinking a lot about these things, to try to better understand my relationship with female masking, and how it influences my perception about myself, about relationships and about my interests.
I found your idea of open conversation cool... it's great to see your updates, but I understand that they become seasonal, as interest in masking increases or decreases. I confess that I follow your blog for some time (some years, lol), and I like your updates. You share a lot of cool stuff. I love the editing of your photos, the themed videos, the accurate descriptions and the shared experience. I think you've built a really cool space here, and I believe it helps a lot for those who are venturing into the world of female masking. Sharing all this, in texts and reflections, photos and videos is very captivating and interesting.
I hope that when you feel free to go back, or feel the urge to mask yourself, that it can be a pleasurable experience :D.
p.s.: I think bodily changes are normal, as are changes in tastes and thoughts (due to time and experience). Since you came back wearing Taylor, I think each face represented a little bit of change... Taylor more youthful and spontaneous (like a high school girl), Lin, playing a more mature face of your soul, Sophia, an adult and independent woman,discovering its potential and making a compromise between the other two faces; and, finally, May, representing changes, new experiences and bringing another face to life: Animus. It was really cool to see it all. I really wanted to thank you for sharing your updates here. My best wishes and feelings.
Thanks all for your comments, I appreciate it!
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