Hey all,
I just read a message asking that I do an update or write-up about some gear. I want to encourage everyone to comment here or send me an e-mail if you're ever interested in hearing about anything.
As for an update: well I'm still alive, COVID-19 and all. Fairly certain I got it early on, before the lockdown, it was pretty serious feeling but not the worst flu I've had (definitely top 5). In 2020 I haven't been dressing as much, partially due to work being totally insane and partially because I was in a relationship where my partner didn't know about my masking and because she was over all the time, so I had no ability to mask really. However, for most of the year I had little to no interest in dressing. During this time, instead I had a stronger urge to dress up in latex and silicone in my 'male' version or my Animus side. She tolerated it on a couple occasions, but didn't seem to enjoy it all that much.
through the year the relationship sort of petered out, however I think we stayed together because of the lockdown, now that it's lifting, it made sense for us to split.
Through the year it made me start to reassess how I engage relationships. I don't think that I will be heavily pursuing fetish relationships, rather I'm hoping to find someone stable that I can start a family with (eventually). It makes me wonder about my fetish in the future, since I do think that every so often I get strong urges to dress and when I'm single, those urges are more frequent. The problem with having this fetish as a replacement for a partner is that after all the fun, I always find the process of undressing sort of empty and lonely (it's also relieving to get out of all those layers). However, from having luckily had a couple partners who are into fetish, I've also found that my female masking is something I prefer to do the most alone (perhaps with another masker, but that's never happened). Then wearing masc-latex during sex is interesting, but it's not at all the same experience as female masking.
The break-up is still fresh, so I haven't been gripped by masking again, but I'm sure that it'll come back soon enough. I still have sort of a back-log of older pictures and videos that I'm slowly working through. However, also in 2019-2020, I took up a new hobby/passion that's sort of re-shaped my body, so my arms are more muscular than they've been before. It makes me sad on some level, since I know that female masking will be harder to achieve a believable look, so I'll have to figure out ways around that, but I'll try my best! I'll likely be posting a bit more in the coming weeks/months, so stay tuned!
